Taxi Drivers and Goals - How Are They The Same?

Have you ever caught a taxi? Perhaps you have been at an airport. You have hefted your bags into the boot and collapsed onto the seat of the car, wedged between your hand luggage, kids and copies of airline magazines. You have been on the go since 4am to get to your destination in a non-English speaking country, leaving the tarmac some 14 hours ago.

So you turn your attention to the taxi driver who is patiently smiling, awaiting instruction, knowing that you can only speak English.

But you don’t know where you want to be next. You don’t want to go to the museum, or the bus station. You don’t want to go to the huge mall. You know you don't want to go to a backpackers, or hostel, or 2 star hotel. 

And still the taxi driver waits for the instruction.

Where DO you want to go?

This is how many of us run our own brains and life. We often don’t know what we want and our brain, which houses the Reticular Activating System (RAS), is like the taxi driver of our body and life and has no way to respond apart from guessing.

Have you ever asked a question of somebody ……What do you want to do with your life? And they come up with a half hour tirade about what they don’t want? Have you ever been asked something similar and replied in a similar way?

Well flip that around. Say what you DO want. No matter how silly or ridiculous it sounds. Declare it to the universe!

This is an important part of goal setting, which successful people do. People who achieve amazing things in their professional and personal lives all use goal setting and, if you are not used to doing that, a little bit of practice is all it takes. It informs your personal, taxi driver (aka RAS) what it wants, what it is to look for and notice. And then it goes about to help you achieve that goal. This can be used for the small immediate goals and also the really big goals that are out in the future.

If I were to say ‘Don’t think of a blue tree’ odds are you are thinking of a blue tree. Or if you aren’t thinking of one, you quickly thought of a blue tree and mentally crossed it out and changed the colour. Don’t is not a positive or effective way to look at your goals.

For example: 'I don’t want to be anxious during the conversation with my boss'. In order for your brain to ‘Not Be Anxious’ it has to think what anxious is, create that feeling, then uncreate that feeling. How confusing and time consuming! ‘I don’t want to wobble over during Yoga this morning’ will have you thinking of wobbling during that Sun Salutation pose. ‘I don’t want to eat chocolate today’ will certainly have you thinking and salivating over that contraband all day and probably giving in, resulting in a binge. This is one of the key reasons that diets don’t work!

Give your brain the right instruction: ‘I want to be relaxed with my boss’, ‘I want to be stable at Yoga’, ’I want to eat in a healthy way today’.

Next, run a little video in your head of how you want things to go - what you will see as you go for your positive goal, what you may hear in your head, what you feel as you go about achieving your goal. This little video really gives the right instructions to your brain and the RAS so it can set about the right ways to help you achieve. And the more ‘real’ you can make that video, the more your brain is able to get the results right for you. 

You can help children start to think in the more goal positive ways if you use this new way of thinking with them. ‘Don’t fall over’ is a great way of showing you care for them, but also effective in telling their brain to ‘Fall Over’. And how often have you then had reason to think ‘I said not to fall over’ after such an instruction? Now you know why. ‘Stay steady’ is a far more positive and generative comment to make, and still indicates that you care for them.

So what about those of you who don’t know at all what you want? Write down what you don’t want and take the opposite of that e.g.: I don’t want to work inside turns into - I want to be outside. You will soon come up with what you DO want and your mind is then able to start noticing the opportunities for you to act upon.

Goal setting really works when you give distinct positive instructions to your mind.

Try it. You will like it! I love to help people set their goals - be it in relationships, career or life choices. I help them link in with their heart based values, their logical and creative minds around how to achieve, and their gutsy courageous action they need to take. Taking the process a little further and deeper, we get 'aligned' and clear and then BOOM - the sky is the limit!!

So you suddenly remember that you have the name of the Hotel on a piece of paper in your bag - you remembered that little video you created in your head, practising how to get to that Hotel while you were worn out, in a foreign speaking country, with tired and cranky kids. Your 5 star goal is about to be achieved, along with a lovely soak in the hotel spa!